4th Week

I want to cuddle with someone rn talking about what's happening today

Lol but I'm single so forget that, plus 'we're' not even halal and never will k. So hi, it's been hectic weeks, is it just me or I'm the only one who felt the orientation week just ended yesterday t.t So many tutorials I've to get it done or maybe I'm the one who need to be blame because I was so lazy. 'was' sekarang dah niat nak jadi rajin starting subuh esok. I promise huhu. So yep I'd done 2 quiz (technical mathematics and engineering science) I got 9/10 for tech math which is nice and I'm grateful for that. Thank you mates. Oh and I'd done Mandarin listening test, I'd thought I did it better which I'm 100% sure I got only 2/3 wrong and it turnt out I got 85%. Right in your face dude ha ha ha. ok pasni tk over-confident dah hm. Oh my classmates are so cool, so cool that there're only 2 gegurls in that class. My roomate and I and oh well they treat us like a queen. Sam treat me several times.. lanje air ja pun but still make me 'terharu' tho. Our class rep, Iem got that angel's voice hahah he always sang in our class.. Iman and Sam kept nagging at me how annoyed they're when Iem start to sing in the bathroom while washing clothes, 'system sound dalam ni best lah' hahah bongoklah. Oh Iem told me about how Sam held his hand in the middle of the pagi buta.. hahah mamai kud. such a cuties lah my classmate. Need to tell you guys about them more often after this. 

Last 2 weeks Muz and I went bbqing with Ain and her classmates. Menyibuk ja menyelit join sem 2 but hey, just for fun. Got the chance to meet Jat and he kept calling me Dik Na and Mustafa to Muz. Ikut suka hati ja mangkuk ni hahah and the day after tomorrow both of us went hiking. I was in such a pressure that my body say can't but my mind kept telling vice versa. For the sake of instagram and good picture, ku gagahkan jua lutut gua yang dah longgar ni and hey finally!! dh sampai puncak. hey siap boleh check in swarmapp lagi okeh omg 3g doe hahah You can check out the picture in my Instagram. Tetiba teringat niat nak exercise la bergym bagai tu kan.. okk *pretend hilang ingatan*

3 more weeks before midsem! Oh I miss my bedroom, I miss the food there. haih lapar la pulak. But anyways, all I can say about my new life here is.. better than ever gitu. So glad that people around me have such a big hearts and respect each other even we made fun of each other a lot. Oh psst I've 2 scandals shh hahah lamala makcik deno ni. Being single sometimes bosan so what could I do. Muz? already have 'the one' lah. jeles itew. oh and my abang is being a good abang like the other abang. abang-ception? hahah not blood-related lah. He study in sem 3 ship design and one of the abang gym. hahah si sado itu abangku. abangmu? hahah jk what did you do during ur free time? every evening (if rajin lah) I will take a walk around campus especially at volleyball court because there's this one abang ada jambang pastu tk tinggi macam terbantut ja kiut weh hahah more to jamu mata je la no har-feelings involve hmmmmm or I'll lepak at slipways merenung masa depan gitu sambil sketch something. Sometimes, during the night, after Isya' I'll go to main hall to play badminton with my guy classmates and I always be that one girl in there.. yang lain semua laki haih. I used to play with abang adam too, almost smash his head instead of the bulu tangkis k. I should stay away from him before someone will check in into hospital bcs of head injury.

aah already 12.09am. The worst part today is my charger rosakk. and right now I'm charging my phone using usb cable and netbook. Fk u kepala charger haih rosak hari lain tkleh ka. I already plan to get a new charger by tomorrow yey. yep gonna sleep rn cuz letih jawab kuiz es tadi. huhu noitee!! #muahrightback

The Un-Send Text

I hope I do have guts to send you this post's link :S

I know you still hate me till today and in the future.. I guess
But anyways, Happy Birthday to you. Finally you're 17 years old, where's my 15 years old syz that I've met before go? lol just kidding of course he grew up now. Last 5 months I was planning to send you a birthday text when the 00.00 strikes and thinking about giving you a gift but nah .. I fcked up. I thought we could be friend till forever but we couldn't make it. I'm having a hard times trying to adapt new situation. You're gone now so what I'm supposed to do? I lost a friend. To you, it's just me being over-dramatic whatsover. I can be the first one to text you but I think I'd enough. I don't feel appreciated by you. It's more like I'm the one who syok sendiri and you just.. okay layan ja la dia ni. I'm sorry if I was wrong in this but this is how I felt towards you, and you never have that commitment and time to explain the truth. So I left.
In life you'll realize there's a purpose for everyone you meet. Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you. But most importantly, some will bring out the best in you.
I'm sorry for not sending any text to you on this day because I'm busy pretending being busy to make me forget about today is your birthday and maybe I'll post a picture of you with your friends in my instagram on 11.59am. ((I promise I'll edit it so it doesn't look like you and people will ignore it)) I'm expecting your 'girlfriend' will do a special things to you better than I could.. lol whatever. So Happy Birthday. I hope you'll have a blast day today with awesome people and have fun because I'm no longer exist in your life yey. ((It might be a good news to you and for me, I'll ended up having major mental breakdown here @ Lumut, Perak)) Take a good care of yourself and your study. Study smart so you can get a straight A in SPM and pursue your study at overseas. Physically, maybe I'll act like I don't care about you anymore but spiritually, I always include you name.. and of course your friends too in my Du'a. I pray for your good health and hoping you'll never find a friend like me anymore, God will help you meeting a better person than me. hm lagi apa eh em, oh whatever competition that you get yourself into.. I hope you'll win and share the gifts with you loved ones... I know you kedekut, so just share lol. ((idk what to wish anymore because my weak soul start to take over myself by crying..and I'm still okay))

Personally, being 17 last year taught me to not trust people easily and spend a lot more of quality time with your friends because I can feel the regret now. Just tell them how grateful you're to have them in your life and try to make a lot of memories with 'em.  I'm sorry I just realised that I take you for granted, I never do the things that I state up there to you and now you're gone. so so sorry hm . You have to face spm this year, all I can say is.. starts now. Whatever subject you take.. just start doing revision right now. I start a little late and look.. fcking 4A and luckily I got the upu but I choose unikl huhu. Don't forget to saving up your money. Start early. The earlier the better. Try to improve your sec language yakni Bahasa Inggeris.. just try speaking with Meman ka amri.. nandos or ikut suka.. it might be helpful in the future. Don't postpone everythings, kalau ada homework, settle cepat2. I ended up being depressed because I couldn't finish my addmath's hw and it feels terrible. Deep down in my heart you're still my friend, and I don't want my friend to get hurt just like I used to.

Okay I think this is enough, I'm not expecting you to read this long paragraphs but if you did. Thank you :(( Sorry for the things that I said last year ..hurting you .. a little bit (( or much idk)) This is 'scheldule' post. It means I don't type this on 5th february..

Today is 31st December 2015 and I'm hoping to get a last text from you so we can try to be friend again in 2016 but I guess it will not happening like yo who am I to you? krik krik krik but ya I just redho je la. hm padan muka aku.
Life is going to get hard sometimes. Get up. You're either an ocean or a puddle. Don't be a puddle. People walk through puddles like they're nothing. Oceans destroyed cities. Choose wisely.
31st December 2015,

Pangkor Island

So Ain and Adilla were staying at my room last night because their house were so messy that they don't have space to sleep that night, so yep my roomate was okay with that. I woke up at 8+ am (terlepas subuh lagi gais astaga). Ain and Adilla were planning to bring me to their house but then I saw Muz was getting ready. I asked her where she want to go and she said she want to go to Pangkor Island. I swear to God no one ever told me about that trip. So I asked her whether there's one spot left and luckily they sais yes. So I was getting ready as soon as I can (probaly the fastest in my life) I brought my pink water bottle and a bagpack full with cloth and so on.  17 people la kud were joining. So we got into zikri's car (9 of us) and that car was packed af macam sardin dah kitorang but we tried to look cool as we can.

We arrived at Terminal Jeti and they told us to have breakfirst first and they wil get back here again in one hour. While having our breakfast, ada la bergossip mak jemah sikit about what happened during wow that I can't tell here ;) hhaah.. After the boys arrived and had their meals. we headed up to the jeti to get on the boat, on the way there we took a lot of photos. tu belum naik bot lagi hahah semua orang eksaited lebih nak masuk dalam frame gambar. So we manage to get into the boat and all of us stand at the back so we can see the breathtaking views in front of our eyes. Yep a lot more photos were taken, tu belum sampai pangkor hahah oh and there's this 3 hijabister on the boat and one of us dengan selambanya asked her to take our group picture hahah maseh akak.. I don't use my phone a lot cuz you know samsung is a little bit honest when it comes to take selfie so I'm gonna go with Iphone..  I don't count how many minutes it takes to arrive at Pangkor heheh.

So we arrived at Pangkor and there're vans that took us to the beach. The ride was hella crazy because of the geography and berbukit. I've to sit between two boys because it already full at the front huhu. After experiencing that crazy ride, we headed up to the beach and quickly we changed our outfits for getting into the water. (idk about the snorkelling untill I arrived there huhu lucky pakai slipar and dah bawak baju lebih) After dah done semua, we wore safety life jackets, put on crocs's shoes ( diorang sedia ) and took the goggles (kalau bagi hilang prepare la rm100) . It requires 2 boats to bring us to the destination so I just took a walk at the front with some other people and suddenly we heard adam and gang said 'bye2 kami naik bot lain' and we looked at each other macam.. okay fine hahah. So on the first boat were zikri, ros, me and the others which I can remember. As soon as we on the boat and dah gerak berapa jauh, zikri noticed someone's phone is with him so he wave to that person showing his phone hahah serupa kena troll dah orang kat sana.

We took a lot of selfies on his phone.. sorry gotta do that hahah and we took video of us tu tapi malas ah nak post muka macam apa ja hahah. After visiting some of the famous rocks there (I wish I was that famous like them) , we arrived at the snorkelling place.. you've to be extra careful when walking cuz the rocks were very sharp that my feet habis calar. After wearing the goggles, I stepped into the water and it's okay lah sebab my feet sampai dasar.. so I want to challenge myself to go to deeper.. but someone keep pulling and holding my hands because she was too scared hahah. yah so I hold her hands and we were snorkelling together. The boys dah pegi jauh dah. Personally I don't know how to swim eaither but hey that safety life jacket is trustable so I just keep going until my feet doesn't touch the ground. After a while, adam's group arrive and it turn out adam doesn't know how to swim too. hahah sembang jangan buat malu ambik course marine tapi takut air. All of us actually tak reti berenang .. ada sorang ja reti pun. Most of the time I keep kicking adam's leg because the wave was pushing me towards him lel.

I manage to see fishes when they threw the expired bread but adam keep telling us to keep and eat that bread as our lunch. nya la keras papoi roti tu. Throughout the snorkelling sessions, adam kept telling his friends to pull him wherever he want to go because his eyes were sore because of the sea water hahah. I just swimming and chilling nearby zikri, muz, syu and so on. lama gak ah dalam air tu so we kitorang naik la ke atas darat and wait for the boat to arrive. While waiting of course la ambil gambar lagi banyak huhu. After that, we visit a lot of rocks and then we arrived at the beach. While waiting for others to finish changing their outfits, adam said, 'kalau nak tahu kalau perempuan tu betul2 perempuan, tanya ja ada tisu ka dak,' he asked every girl with that question and semua takdak until shu came and asked adam back.. nak tisu basah ka kering and we laughed ..hahah sejati betul la shu. We took the same van to go to the jeti and while waiting for the boat, ros created pangkor's group for photo sharing. Sumpah banyak do gambar.

so lepas dah sudah naik bot, we went to kfc to fulfill our lapar-ness. Gambar lagi hahah and after that zikri decided to take us to go to pasar malam. Inside that car was so festives hahah dengan menyanyi bagai.. lawak semua ada.. bila dah smpai aeon tu,we're looking for parking and lucky zikri have human alarm at the back that day and we found the parking spot while zikri keep saying 'syaitan' because he's already annoyed with all of us hahah sorry. Muz and I performed our Asar inside that aeon and walk together just tengok2 pe ade kat pasar malam tu. We're the first one who arived at the car so yep.. just scrolling our phone. After that, Zikri took all of us back at hostel and it's alreay 7++ pm. hehe so thanks ziri for giving us ride and refuse taking duit minyak from us. Thank you abang and kakak faci despite all of us perangai tak ketahuan, still taking us to this pangkor trip.. I heard they're planning for hiking nnti huhu can't wait for that..

so here's the picture!!

lawa pulak kamera samsung huhu

band baru #soon hahah

the people in my circle? those who make me feel blessed not stressed