Here I am. Being heartless again. From this now on, I'm gonna fade my existence in the real world. Mukhriz had gone to Kulim. There're just Ain, Ajiq and Cupi. Other than that, I don't want to know about their performance.. their life. It is hurt when the trust that I keep giving tp them.. just smashed like that. I'm scared to trust people right now. Even the senior. I'm gonna teach myself that don't expect too much from things that you're un-sure. Otherwise.. your hearts shattered again. I'm tired to bend my knees; collect the shattered pieces. Glued it again. And repeat with other person. I keep giving chance.. because "chance" that I'll never received.. I tried to give it to one who needs but they did this to me. Don't put people on the edge, thus a worst macabre is born.
I am now. I started to hate people. Every single person whom text me.. I believe that the words that they're sending is lies. I gave my sould to liars. No point of having them anymore. The day I goes into university. You'll see me, walking alone, wearing earphones, hearing some musics that doesn't suits your taste and wear the outfits that nobody ever look at it. It's my choice. People around me betrayed me and I had enough. Painkiller is too strong for me. Sometimes I felt like my life is undeserving. Like Ain said I must put my trust in Allah. Yes I am an I'm always trust Him. I know I'd did domething that very wrong past years which I can't mention but is this how He's gona punnish me. I learnt my lesson. Maybe that time I was so immature and try to do new things but I can't control the wanted feelings. In the end of the day.. I regret everything.
I'd set my walls up. The idea of meet up.. having bbq with classmate for the last time is not gonna happen. Once I hate those guys, I always.. hate 'em. I forgive 'em but the things that they did is unacceptable. Go on with your life. As long as you don't disturb mine, you're fine.