Stand Up

4 more days untill the result's day. I admit that even me personally feel so scared and want to puke whenever I think about it. I don't want to dissapoint people that supported me. I got this idea.. it's just thing that will help me to overcome my fear.. I'll make a card.. I'll write down every word that Faiq told me before. Reading it back make me feel calm and smile. It feel like I'm in my own world. It's just me and him. That day.. I hope that I can feel the sense that he's sitting next to me.. accompanying me to claim the result as my parent can't make it before that have a job. I'll feel like he's looking at my face..admiring my long eye-lashes attew haha just experiencing my imagination. Even he's 200++ km away from me.. I still can feel his presence . whatever happens.. happens. 

That day I will hand Aiman .. a shirt that Syaz want the most. sorry I can't give it to Syz because he hurt me more than  twice and fooling with my trust that I'd given to him. Do he need to lie, he can tell the truth but he choose not to tell.. He dissapointed me. I'll let his sweetheart buy that shirt herself so syz will love her even more. Even there's a.. story about giving a guy shirt could destroy your relationship with him.. I don't trust that story but if it's true.. I'd take this risk.. lost contact with Aiman is... It's hard for me but I hope it will never happen. Amin. 

To the people that on the same boat with me. Believe yourself. Don't stop praying. Let go and let God. Whatever result that you get.. accept it that you had done your best and that is the result. You still have the second chance at uni's life. Don't kill yourself haha that's not the problem solving.. you'll 'menyusahkan' your parent.. yeah that had to find kain kafan.. that kapas.. to bury you dalam tanah. haih.. this is why I never be a teacher. sometimes I'll give people bad vibes and they'll hate me. so goodluck. So I'm deanna. I want to apologize if my attittude annoyed you guys. This is me. So yeah.. goodluck!!