24 Jun 2017

Last Ramadhan | 2017

Its been 2 months I didn't update. Its been a hectic semester for me tho.. and the pain doesn't end yet. I'd still remember on 16+ weeks onward, my classmates and I had to deal with a lot of assignments, quiz, tests, mini project, report and so on but in the end, its all worth it. I've been dealing with a lot of stresses and somehow I feel bad for myself. How could I do that? I always keep reminding myself about NOT to do last minutes work but nah.. still in the same phase. Luckily there's Zarul to help me going through all of that. Zarul is one of the tabah people around me right now.. I always throw tantrums at him whenever I'd to face some kind of bad days and etc. Thats why I love him so much *cries at the corner of my room*  I just turned into 20 years old last 12 days ago and on that day, I'm the happiest. He's with me throughout that day and he kept suprising me.. ''non stop'' . I don't know what I did this whole time to receive that kind of treat. I'll update about what happened during my birthday, don't worry, I already saved the memory in my journal so I just had to flip it all back to refresh how that day was going.

Ramadhan this year, I learnt more about people around me. The one who really there to help and the one who stand as 'friend' in my contact list only. But let just forget about that since it is not worth my time to write about it. Overall, I literally spent most of my Ramadhan this year with him and I don't even feel bad about it. Why would I feel bad to spend my time with him? He's one of the (not so many people) who doesn't make me feel bad about myself. Besides, Iman and I have been besties since couple days ago. We teamed up together, do all the assignments and stayed up all night just to finish our last minutes report. Procrastinating at our best. My mock interview videos had settle. Thanks to Iman for having such patience dealing with me.. dealing with my terrible singing and dancing talent. fun fact: If I was in a video, I'll not watch them. Ever. Video time semester 2 subject mandarin pun tak penah tengok.

I do write 'pain don't end yet' sentence on my first paragraph aite? so my university thought its gonna be cool to put study week on the same week as Hari Raya Puasa. Cool right? To be honest, I do have major problems with Static, Auxiliary and Thermodynamics subjects. I just.. I don't want to fail again. I always let myself down with my attitude. Its always the same problems thats haunting me since last semester. huwargh I gotta change myself for real next semester as next year its gonna be my last year for my diploma and I want good cgpa and everything. Deanna.. please.. change your attitude or you'll end up hating yourself like you did last time. I just review my exam slip and.. my seating for thermodynamics is #1. The closer to the door, the faster you can run from junior that see you as senior repeat hahah.

So just wish me luck guys.. I need those luck and good vibes right now. 'Raya every year but CGPA maintains forever'. Hopefully there're no unwanted things happened during this peak times and may no bitch ever come close to my boyfriend as I'm exhausted from mental koyak lately. Please don't. Find your own mates sis fuh fuh fuh.

sorry for quick updates, will come back as soon as I finished my finals. muah xoxo